Two hundred and ten eggs, counted, obviously, twice. The only citizen who files her own returns in duplicate.
The Economy of the Republic
A nation that runs on eggs
Every economy needs an export. Ours has feathers. The hens of Kisi lay, the Bureau of Egg Statistics counts, and the Feed & Agriculture ministry makes sure the grain arrives, so the crate that reaches your kitchen was laid by a hen with a name, a page, and, frankly, opinions.
The National Egg Census
This month's output
The one economic indicator the whole Republic agrees to argue about.
5,120
eggs recorded · July 2026
A record month as the flock grew and the young layers found their rhythm. The opposition demanded a recount. The recount agreed. The opposition found that suspicious.
| June 2026 | 3,500 | |
|---|---|---|
| July 2026 | 5,120 |
Open for business
What the Republic sells
Farm-fresh eggs
Collected by hand every morning and packed the same day. Order a crate and we'll confirm the price and delivery for your area before you pay a naira. You can even read about the hen who laid them.
The Hatchery
How the Republic grows its citizens, and how a new keeper starts a flock. Day-old chicks and point-of-lay pullets are the next arm of the economy. Tell us what you're looking for and we'll tell you honestly what's available and when.
Hatchery ordering opens as the flock grows.No chick numbers or prices are posted yet, we quote each enquiry directly rather than publish a figure that isn't real.
On the production line
Latest from the laying houses
Milestones as they happen, because behind every economic figure is a hen having a very big day.
The Republic's most-awaited first egg. Certified within the hour, celebrated with a retroactive public holiday, answered with four words: 'I did my best.'
The President's running total, published in the Census by her own insistence: 'The Republic has no royal eggs.' Audited, at her request, by the opposition.
Who keeps it running
The economic cabinet
Three ministries, one shared obsession: that the eggs are counted and the feed budget balances.
- Egg Affairs
Ọlánrewájú
Custodian of the National Egg Census · Certification of first eggs and landmark counts · Egg-handling standards from nest to collection tray · Annual State of the Shell address
The National Feed Budget and its many defenders · Grain quality, storage, and the war on damp · Kitchen-scrap diplomacy with the farmhouse · Seasonal forage planning
Chick education and foraging apprenticeships · Mentorship pairings with senior hens · The national hatch-day registry (junior section)
Rather back the whole enterprise?
Buying eggs keeps the Republic solvent. If you'd like to do more, feed, clean water, veterinary care, or a comfortable retirement for a senior hen, there's a straight-talking way to help, with no confusion about where the money goes.
Back the farm →