Ministry of Egg Affairs

“One Nation, One Shell”

The Minister

Ọlánrewájú “Bright Feather”

The impeccably groomed Minister of Egg Affairs, survivor of the Missing Breakfast Grain Affair, two hundred grams, one panel of inquiry, one white paper, and the most watched apology tour in national history.

Mandate

Custodian of the National Egg Census
Certification of first eggs and landmark counts
Egg-handling standards from nest to collection tray
Annual State of the Shell address

Active projects

Operation Gentle Hands
Ongoing
A retraining programme on respectful egg collection, launched after the Assembly ruled that eggs 'are laid, not seized.'
The Egg Registry Digitisation Committee
Stalled (officially: progressing)
Announced with fanfare; currently awaiting the report of the sub-committee set up to review the committee's terms of reference.